Stifling joy in football shouldn’t be goal

College football is not meant to be played in a stuffy boardroom, where everyone owns identical roles and each move is choreographed. It is not meant to possess the monotony of an upper division lecture on business law.

Athletes can discover enough to be bored about during the course of a day without having to act the part of a monk when scoring a touchdown for fear of penalty.

If they can't, most will eventually be assigned to read "Wuthering Heights," anyway.

What arrived with good intentions has become a celebratory rule in college football that is now more absurd than calling timeout before faking a field-goal attempt.

(Oops).

Florida on Saturday came within nine seconds of having its undefeated season and national championship hopes possibly buried in overtime. The Gators were tied with Arkansas at home late, but a few ridiculously bad calls allowed them to drive within comfortable field-goal distance.

Caleb Sturgis, the Florida place-kicker who earlier in the season beat out a former Lou Groza Award semifinalist for the job, made good from 27 yards.

And immediately motioned for teammates not to celebrate.

The Swamp was swamped with euphoria. There were more than 90,000 crazed Gators fans rejoicing in a sea of orange. There wasn't a voting machine in sight to suppress the joy.

And the kid who just made the kick of his life was imploring others to remain calm.

And his head coach was furiously signaling players to get off the field and stop jumping around and, well, acting exactly how they should in such a moment.

And anyone with a clue who was watching asked: How stupid is this?

We are reminded weekly now that the excessive-celebration penalty meant to prevent taunting and at times subsequent fighting needs to be eliminated and revised with a statute that isn't, well, idiotic.

The problem is that all of this somehow got lost in translation.

taunt: a sarcastic challenge or insult.

celebrate: to observe or commemorate an event with ceremonies or festivities.

I can't believe I am about to write this next thought, but most officials are smart enough to distinguish between the two. They can determine that a ball carrier somersaulting into the end zone or screaming in the face and making hand gestures to an opponent is far different than someone who just scored and reacted by flipping the ball into the air and pointing his arms to the heavens.

Or so you would think.

But the call is made so inconsistently from game to game, from conference to conference, there really is no line distinctive enough to know what is acceptable and what is not.

So they have turned what should be spontaneous, exciting moments into Bible study. They have made it so if a player offers the slightest motion beyond celebrating with a teammate, his team risks a yellow flag and 15 yards.

They have, in part, killed off much of the spirit from a sport defined by its electric and magical atmospheres.

"Personally, I'd like to see kids be able to be more demonstrative," Utah coach Kyle Whittingham said. "I don't have a big problem when they are not bringing attention directly to themselves but rather showing emotion with teammates. I know there has been this big push to get celebrations under wraps again because things got lax there for a while, but I'd like to think there is a happy medium.

"I've got to be honest -- I've never paid attention when someone else scores. I'm too worried about getting our kickoff return set and what we have to do next."

This shouldn't be so difficult. The rule states any "delayed, excessive, prolonged or choreographed act by which a player (or players) attempts to focus attention upon himself (or themselves)" is subject to penalty.

Tossing a ball into the air or raising your arms shouldn't and doesn't qualify.

What's next, basketball teams can't storm the court after a game-winning shot at the buzzer? Baseball players can't gather at home plate following a walk-off home run? Swimmers can't splash the water after touching first? The tuba player can't high-five the drummer after a flawless halftime performance?

There has to be an allowance for unprompted reaction within the framework of certain moments. Washington quarterback Jake Locker against Brigham Young last season. Georgia wide receiver A.J. Green against Louisiana State a few weeks ago. Misguided celebratory calls have directly influenced the outcome of games. That's just wrong.

"I think one of the things that they're trying to do is keep the integrity of college football and keep college football different than pro football," UNLV coach Mike Sanford said. "So I think the intent of it is good."

Maybe. But if the intent is for Caleb Sturgis to make the kick of his life, preserve for another week a perfect season for his team and feel his first reaction must be to remind others not to react accordingly, then college sports are messed up far more than most already imagined.

Las Vegas Review-Journal sports columnist Ed Graney can be reached at 702-383-4618 or egraney@reviewjour nal.com. He also can be heard weeknights from 11 p.m. to 1 a.m. on "The Sports Scribes" on KDWN (720 AM) and www.kdwn.com.