’30 Rock’ still fighting the good fight for entertaining television

At some point this season, "30 Rock's" Jack Donaghy (Alec Baldwin) will have to lose NBC as part of a Nigerian e-mail scam. Or trade it for some magic beans.

It's the only way Tina Fey can continue having her fictional NBC executive make worse decisions than his real-life counterparts.

Donaghy, the vice president of East Coast Television and Microwave Oven Programming at parent company General Electric, was conceived as being cartoonishly out of touch with television, a worst-case example of what happens when businessmen are put in charge of creative endeavors.

It turns out Fey didn't think big enough in her ridiculousness.

In NBC's current corporate culture, the uptight, profit-first, wouldn't-be-caught-dead-after-6 p.m.-without-a-tuxedo Donaghy -- whose office, it should be noted, contains an autographed photo of Jesus -- would come off like a shaggy-haired stoner playing Hacky Sack in the quad.

Even Donaghy's most laughable programming ideas -- "SeinfeldVision," which inserted old footage of the comedian into NBC's existing shows, and "MILF Island," a reality show with the tagline "20 MILFs, 50 eighth grade boys, no rules" -- would earn him Executive of the Year.

Yes, it's only been a little more than a month since the last time I complained about the sorry state of NBC. And I don't like to repeat myself, preferring instead to focus on the likes of strippers, pawnshops or the series I'm currently pitching to E!: "Stripper Pawnshop."

I just never dreamed things would get so much worse so quickly.

Since the debut of "The Jay Leno Show," which holds hostage the coveted 10 p.m. time slot each weekday, NBC has:

• seen "Law & Order: SVU," which it moved from 10 p.m. Tuesdays to 9 p.m. Wednesdays, go from a dominant hit to third place in its hour.

• stood by helplessly as "Law & Order," which it exiled to Fridays to make room for "SVU," began rotting on the vine.

• canceled the critically acclaimed cop drama "Southland," before any of its second-season episodes aired, because it was deemed too dark for anything but the woefully unavailable 10 p.m. slot.

Honestly, better programming decisions could be made by a blind monkey flinging poo at the wall.

Before Leno's fans get all riled up again, I have to stress that I don't have anything against the man. But most of the time, even he doesn't seem to want to be in prime time.

And since its debut, the last-place "Leno's" only accomplishment has been dragging down ratings for both the late local news and, in a domino effect, "The Tonight Show."

There are even rumblings that if a proposed sale to Comcast goes through, the network could be turned into a cable channel.

It's a heart-breaking turn of events for NBC, which has become the Grey Gardens of networks: One day, it's on top of the world; the next, there are holes in the roof and its executives are stepping over raccoons.

Thankfully, the brilliant "30 Rock" (9:30 p.m. Thursdays, KVBC-TV, Channel 3) is still fighting the good fight in favor of quality TV.

While picking up the show's third straight Emmy for best comedy last month, Fey thanked NBC for keeping her series on the air, "even though we are so much more expensive than a talk show."

And last week's episode, which was all about Donaghy's search for new and inventive ways to eschew quality and pander to Middle America, ended with a lesson in network management. "There's nothing wrong with being fun and popular and just giving people what they want," he told Fey's Liz Lemon as the clock struck 9:58. He then turned, looked directly into the camera and dryly introduced the next show. "Ladies and gentlemen, Jay Leno."

There are signs that NBC already has given up on the four-week-old season. It recently slashed "Day One," its intriguing attempt at "Lost"-style storytelling, from a midseason series to a four-hour "event," and there's nothing new on its schedule to look forward to but the returns of "Chuck" and, sometime next summer, "Friday Night Lights."

But, like one of those women on "Maury" who just can't seem to see her man for the dog that he is, I keep hoping NBC will realize the error of its ways, free up the 10 p.m. hour and get back to making the good, old-fashioned, crowd-pleasing hits it became known for.

To that end, the network is developing a Jerry Bruckheimer action series for next fall, and it recently won a bidding war for a new spy drama from J.J. Abrams.

Either series could single-handedly put NBC on the road to recovery.

Assuming it doesn't simply move Conan to 9 p.m. and Jimmy Fallon up to 8 and ask its last remaining viewer to turn out the lights on his way out.

Christopher Lawrence's Life on the Couch column appears on Sundays. E-mail him at clawrence@reviewjournal.com.