LETTER: Prepare yourself for the new egalitarian (authoritarian) America

In regard to the national election: May I say congratulations, patriots (comrades). The Party would like to thank the proletariat and bourgeoisie for your brave and freely given votes to bring more enlightened government to this great land.

We your leaders are looking forward to implementing (enforcing) the people’s will. But know that this great leap forward will require cooperation (obedience) and sacrifice — from some more than others. “From each according to their ability, to each according to their needs” will be our guiding principal, as we transform the old and failed constitutional patriarchy that has served you so poorly for the past 244 years.

The best is yet to come, as we will ensure and provide for, by any means necessary, the equality of outcomes for all humans who may be physically within the borders of the United States no matter how you came here. There may be disparities at first, as the new government integrates capitalists and their running dogs into the new egalitarian (authoritarian) capitalist state. But rest assured that Marxism American style will provide the best, most equal outcome for all, just at it has done so many times in the past. You have nothing to lose but your chains (freedom).